of two minds

God, in His great love for us, sometimes has to reveal things about us that are truly painful and hard to look at.  I was just hit upside the head with such a truth.  I would never have considered myself a two-faced person, deliberately saying one thing to someone, and then talking about them behind their backs. But God showed me, that in some areas, I am of two minds on some things.  I feel certain things about situations, people or myself, based on past experiences, the desire to protect myself, and just plain misinformation.  But the other side of that same coin, often holds the truth.  I must learn to discern what is true, what is not, and what I just, plain and simply, can’t possibly know.  It is the place of “not knowing” that cause the most problems for me.  If I don’t know something, sometimes my own opinions slip in there, masquerading as the truth, and I become deceived by my own opinions.

I believe this is what God is trying to show me right now.  The only remedy for my own opinions, is Truth.  And truth in only ever found in God and His Word.

“For the Word of God is Living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword; piercing even to the dividing of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” (Hebrews 4:12)

I am learning to die to my own opinions about things, to “take every thought captive and make it obey Christ.” ( 2 Corinthians 10:5)  I am slowly learning to let go of my desire to control, and protect, and be safe.  I am learning to trust God to be my safety, my refuge, my vindicator; the One who works all things together for the good of those who love Him.

It’s a life long journey, but in the end, I will be free from being of two minds on issues.  I will only and always have the mind of Christ, for eternity.  I look forward to that reality.  But in the meantime, I humbly submit my tired, broken, and often “wrong-opinioned,” self to God.  “He who promised is faithful to complete the work He has begun in me.” (Philippians 1:6)  Thank You God, for loving me, for loving all of us, this much

amen and amen!