Hidden

⁴ But I said, “I have toiled in vain,
I have spent My strength for nothing and vanity;
Yet surely the justice due to Me is with the Lord,
And My reward with My God.” (Isaiah 49:4)

There are so many times when I can’t see what God is doing.  I remember telling someone during a deep, dark time in my life, “I want vindication.”  it was a time where I was crying out for God to explain Himself.  “What are you doing here, God?  Are you mad at me?  What did I do wrong to cause all this grief?”  the purpose of it all was hidden from my understanding,  I had to cease wrestling and striving to understand it all, and just rest in knowing that He is God.

Yet surely the justice due to Me is with the Lord,
And My reward with My God.”

One of the most comforting truths that comes from the Scriptures is

³ For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3)

I rest only in the knowledge that god knows what He is doing.  Is there anybody else out there, who had plans for there own life, thoughts of how things would be; and it just didn’t turn out that way?  Your life is hidden with Christ in God.  We died to our own ways, to our own dreams, our own ideas, when we came to Christ.  Many people might think this is foolish, but when you know God, who is reveals Himself through the Word; and when you experience His unending love, nothing else matters.

What plans could I have ever had that can match the surpassing glory of knowing Christ Jesus, My Lord.  When I cried out to God, “Father, we have lost everything trying to follow you, what else can we do?”  I distinctly heard His quiet whisper of an answer, “Yes, Carole, and when you have considered it as nothing, that is when You will truly know me and understand the joy of knowing Me.

You see, all the stuff I lost    was   the way of knowing Him.   Those things were in His way.  they needed to be removed in order for Him to answer the prayer of my heart to know Him more.  I kept asking God to let me know Him more, but I didn’t know it would cost so much.  Well, actually it cost Christ His life.  And the loss of mere things,  it truly is nothing compared to knowing Him.

I still don’t understand it all, perhaps I never will in this life.

4 But I said, “I have toiled in vain,
I have spent My strength for nothing and vanity;
Yet surely the justice due to Me is with the Lord,
And My reward with My God.” (Isaiah 49:4)

But my labor in Christ will never be in vain.  So I never became the writer I thought I was going to be.  I’m still writing to anyone who will listen, the beautiful truths about God and how much He loves us.   This dream that God had for me is far better than any dream I could have ever had for myself.