Mom, your sin is loud

Hysterical!  I mean, when my 22-year old son said to me, “Mom, it’s kind of like, you sin loud, and Dad’s sin is quieter.” I just looked at him, for a second and then burst out laughing.  Nobody could have summed it up better than that!  Our son had witnessed a disagreement between my husband and I.  It was one of those arguments that’s a slow burner, the kind that simmers all day, and really comes to a boil at night.  Now after 32 years of marriage, it is extremely rare that we will yell at one another.  But that’s not the “loud” that my son meant.  He was talking about how my sin tends to be behavioral, and my husband’s sin, attitudinal.  I’m just not good at “covering-up.”  When I’m hurt, it’s obvious.  When I’m angry it’s obvious.  When I’m depressed, or anxious, you guessed it, it’s obvious.  I just can’t seem to hold it all in and put on that ‘happy, smiling face,’ to everyone around me.  I have skipped events because I knew I was going to cry.  I have skipped church because of fear and anxiety.  Now, my husband on the other hand, he can hold it all in, for days, weeks, months, even years. The toll this takes on him personally, is quite high. He has struggled with Physical symptoms because he holds it all in.  He is very self-controlled, yet very hard to read. I, on the other hand, make a fool of myself more often than I care to admit.  But sin is sin, and God gently guides us both to work things out through humility, confession, forgiveness and reconciliation. I tell you all this just to say that God can transform any one of us.  He never gives up, never quits on us.  He is in there for the long haul. We can’t invade God’s personal space, He invites us to Come to Him.  He promises us that the truth will set us free. Jesus says:

“If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; ³² and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” (John 8)

Now I will in no way tell you that this is an easy path, it is hard.  But the beauty of it, is that it truly works.  I know it is hard to face those deeper aspects of ourselves.  But I have never known such freedom, as the freedom to see myself, as I really am, confess the truth to God about it, and have Him set me free.  It is a continual journey, because we are complex people, we have many layers to our personalities.  Like the rings of a tree trunk tell us how old it is, so our lives begin to reveal who we are inside.  God desires to set us free and make us Beautiful and Glorious , transformed into the person He created us to be.  Sin has marred us, both our sin, and the sin of others.  But God says this:

⁶ Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, and in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.⁷ Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. (Psalm 51) Hyssop was the plant that was used to apply blood to the lintel and doorposts, during the Passover in Egypt.  It protected the people inside from the Plague of Death.  For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 6:23) Jesus died that death for us, and offers us restoration through believing in what He accomplished.  It all starts with embracing the truth about ourselves and letting Him forgive, cleanse and transform us, from the inside out.  Yeah! Our sin is loud sometimes, but His Grace and Forgiveness is louder.  Let us be transformed by His love.