Father, I have lost my joy

Photo by Cody Haines

Hebrews 4:12

For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

Father, I have lost my joy

Life has sapped me of my strength, just life in general

I try to sit before You, but I’m distracted, fidgety, restless

Your Word is Living and Active, sharper than any two-edged sword

and, well frankly, I think I need some cutting, some removal of what stands between us

You know what those things are better than I

Your Word pierces, cuts though all the pretense, all the shams, all the masks

dividing soul and body, joints and marrow, discerning my thoughts and intentions

I can’t conjure joy, any more than I could conceive a child without my husband

I am helpless to reignite my Passion for You, I come to You and just Cry out

More of You, More of who You are, Less of me, Dear God, Less of me

I must Decrease, You must Increase

As the Morning Mist obscures the Landscapes in the Dawning hours of the Day

So my future is hidden from me, and I must lean upon the One who holds it

The One who has never failed me in the Past, who enables me to endure the Present

and who promises to guide me into a future of plans for good, plans to give me hope.

And so I wait upon You, My Father, Holy Spirit, Redeeming Christ

You are both the Author of my Faith, and its Perfecter

I sit here and simply abide in You

Hebrews 12:2

fixing our eyes on Jesus,

the author and perfecter of faith,

who for the joy set before Him endured the cross,

despising the shame,

and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

I too, despise the shame of losing my Joy for You, I have lost My First Love

Restore me, Dearest Lord to a Place of the Purity and Simplicity of Devotion to Christ

I need You, I Love You, I wait upon You

Amen

Photo by carole l. haines

1 Response to Father, I have lost my joy

Bob & Peg Councill says:

July 28, 2015 at 6:17 pm

Am in prayer for you. Just noting the difference in your view of life since you went off your meds. TOTALLY UNDERSTAND YOUR REASON FOR DOING SO THOUGH AND AM NOT JUDGING – just an observation,

When does Bruce get back from Houston? Of course, from the weather forecast I see, Baltimore may not be too much better for you.

Let me know of any specific prayer needs. Blessings, Mom

_____

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