Serving that Inner Tyrant

By: carole l. haines
“O Lord, the God of Israel, who are enthroned above the cherubim, You are the God, You alone, of all the kingdoms of the earth. You have made heaven and earth. ¹⁶ Incline Your ear, O Lord, and hear; open Your eyes, O Lord, and see…¹⁹ Now, O Lord our God, I pray, deliver us from his hand that all the kingdoms of the earth may know that You alone, O Lord, are God.”                     (2 Kings 19:15 & 19 NASB)

What drives us to do the things we do, think the way we think, seek the things we seek?  I am finding, as I grow deeper with Christ, that I have been serving an Inner Tyrant unawares.  This tyrant tells me I’ll never amount to much, that I haven’t really accomplished anything of much value in my life.  This tyrant tells me that I am insignificant and rather worthless.  It tells me I am not that valuable coin that people yearn to find as they pillage through a heap of coins at the Antique Store, but I am just one that is tossed aside as common, useless, and plain.
How discouraging is that, right? But I needed to see this truth, I had to know what was inside of me, and let God bring it up; so that I could take it to Him, who is My True Lord and Master.  He alone is my Maker and determines my value.  He thought I was so valuable that He gave up His life to save mine.
There is a Scripture in which Hezekiah, King of Judah, was attacked by an arrogant King and he threatened to take all the cities by force.  Hezekiah did something very interesting with the letter informing him of this siege, and the Enemy King’s threats.  He took the letter to the temple and laid it out before God and prayed to God for help. The whole story is found in 2 Kings 18 & 19. It’s an amazing read.
But I feel God would have us do the same with our Inner Tyrants. Those nagging lies that keep poking at us, prodding us, telling us things that are not true, about ourselves, our lives, and others.  This Inner Tyrant lies to us about God too.  Perhaps you don’t have to deal with an Inner Tyrant of self-doubt, who continually goads you and tries to bring you down, but I know many who do. I believe most of us struggle with this. Let us take this letter of lies about us, written in our hearts by past experiences and mistreatment, and let us spread it out before the Lord our God, and pour out our hearts before Him.  He will hear, answer, and deliver us with His truth.  I am in the process of doing this right now, as these things are unfolded inside of me; and God is comforting and encouraging me.  I don’t want to serve anyone else but God alone, and I’m sure that is how you all feel as well.  So, let’s come before Him, as King Hezekiah did, and spread out these things before Him, asking for His deliverance, healing and restoration.  He desires our freedom even more than we do.